I’m not a religious man but if I were, I’d be thinking Andy Murray was sent from above to torture those of us that love him. Coming from the dead a total of 7 times across 2 days has us studying miracles and comparing them closely to this, for what much more would it need to constitute as one? I suppose we can now allow ourselves to whisper the possibility of a medal away on the wind as a wish, for nobody but our own selves and those many thousands like us will know that we’re all thinking it. We only have Murray himself to blame for such irrationality.
If their first round Olympic match felt like one that Murray and his doubles partner Dan Evans were losing until they won, then this match felt like one that got away from them right up until it didn’t. They won the first set easily and found pushback from their opponents in the second manageable. Standing two more career-ending points for Murray down in the deciding championship breaker, it felt like it was time to try and cope with the enormity of it all.
***
Following their first round win, Murray was asked how he faced down match points knowing that a loss would mean the end of his career:
“I wasn’t like “oh my God, my career is about to be over. What should I do?” I was like “where am I going to serve and how am I going to execute it?””
The finish lies only beyond a final loss or a final win and that’s a good thing because playing to win is far more familiar than playing for a tiny bit more of all that he’s ever really known. Pressure is properly managed by being at ease with your expectations of an event regardless of external factors. Those of us watching were screaming at a hypothetical situation that existed on the other side of a point yet to be played; for Murray, there simply existed no other side.
Evans is all of us at this tournament and it’s excellent to witness. His nervous excitement is palpable, kid-on-Christmas sort of stuff. He dropped points to be at the Olympics, his title in Washington last year sacrificed. He’ll pick up the pieces later on, alongside the rest of us. His career goes on after this week, as do our lives. For now, his bulldog ruggedness works well in conjunction with Murray’s survival instincts and there are very obvious moments where Evans is taking the lead in points, actively moving the elements of their team with a calmness not usually associated with him. Whatever happens now, he’ll remember this week and be remembered by others that’ll remember it for life.
Embed from Getty Images***
A few weeks ago, prior to his final Wimbledon, Murray was posed a question about how he felt about his career coming to an injury-inflicted end:
“Maybe this is just how it was supposed to happen for me.”
That line has leaked through his goodbye at Wimbledon and absolutely drenched the Olympics. Everything about his first two matches here have been so incredibly him. He’s started badly. He’s fought well. He’s cried, not at all an uncommon sight for someone that many once claimed lacked emotion. He’s thanked Evans for sharing this moment with him and sat in the middle of it all, head down. There’s at the very least one more chance for more of this to come but you could see that this is already the run he’d been waiting on, matches that he can proudly sign off on being his last.
It’ll all be so different after this week, won’t it? The actual positive essence of certain days will no longer be dictated by one man’s tennis match scores. I’ll no longer ruin my regular daily structure to watch him. I’ll sleep more. In a way, I’ll be a relieved. In a way, I’ll be devastated. All things change but I don’t want them too and I’m blessed to be able to say I’m a fan of the man that currently has me believing that if I hope hard enough, maybe we’ll all just stay frozen out here on the precipice. Is there really such a difference between a week and a forever?
He will always be undermined by a section of tennis fans that struggled to accept his place alongside his most notable career rivals but it was because of his willingness to fall on the line as many times as he did that he always felt more tangible. Like a guy you could just chat with endlessly about stuff and he’d never mention that time he won Wimbledon twice. You could reach out and prod him in the face with your finger and he’d tell you to fuck off with a laugh. That’s the kind of real he felt like.
He lost more big matches than he won throughout his career and that makes this very final hurrah this week all the more intriguing. It’s damn rare that an ending fits the person but if the last image of Murray as a professional player is one with an Olympic medal around his neck, it would be as close as we’re ever likely to get. I don’t think I’m whispering it anymore when I say that I do need to see it happen.
Few athletes have tasted retirement and spat it out as much as Murray. Maybe it’s the acidic finality of it or the stomach drop of difference it promises. I suppose you either love it or learn to do so with time but Murray clearly wants to ease himself into the process and won’t go until he really must. Never again will we get to watch him play a professional match after this week. More importantly for him, never again will he get the opportunity to inflict them on us. This was always far harder for him than it ever was for us and what’s just a few more heart-attacks anyway? Keep saving us a little longer though. Just a little longer. One more one more time.
I’ve lost my mind over this man on multiple occasions over the years and if at all possible, I’d like to lose it a few more times before the end. Leave us angry that you’re going, Andy. Leave us bereft. Leave us golden.
Embed from Getty Images Embed from Getty Images
Popcorn Tennis 
My emotions to a T; I look forward to longer sleeps, near to normal blood pressure and the absence of the depression I felt at his losses. He’s been a one-off and the one I’ll remember most in a long line of tennis memories. It’s been both a joy and a pain and it’s been worth it! x
LikeLike
Lovely piece, Scott, but you did get something wrong here. They LOST the first set against Nishikori/Daniel in the 1rst round 6-2, they didn’t win it handily.
LikeLike